My family never thought that we would end up in this situation…
My Tatay suddenly suffered a stroke and had to be rushed to a large hospital in Quezon City. The daily treatment costs were expensive, the hospital fees alone amounted to tens of thousands of pesos. Nanay and I ran around everywhere, scraping together every penny, but we were still short.
I turned to my wife, confident that she would not hesitate to help. My wife – Mariel – was a senior manager, with a monthly salary of around ₱100,000, compared to many people, she was quite well-off. I thought simply, she was my manugang (daughter-in-law), and my Tatay was also her Tatay, so spending ₱40,000 on hospital fees should not be difficult.
But as soon as I opened my mouth, she curled her lips and replied curtly:
— “Bigas ba ang gagastusin para pakainin ang manok sa gubat?”
(Where is the rice to raise wild chickens?)
That sentence was like a knife cutting off the last bit of faith in me. Nanay I napatulala, her hands trembling as she held the hospital bill. She never thought that one day she would have to hear her daughter-in-law say such cruel words to her asawa (husband), to Tatay himself.
I gritted my teeth and asked again:
“Ibig wish sabihin, kahit isang kusing, hindi ka tutulong para sa Tatay ko na nasa ospital?”
Mariel calmly, her voice cold:
“Mag-isip ka nga. Pinaghirapan ko ang pera ko, bakit ko ilalaan sa iba? Kailangan kong mag-ipon para sa anak ko, para sa future namin. Kung gusto mong tulungan ang Tatay mo, ikaw na ang maghanap ng paraan. Huwag mong idamay ang pera ko.”
I choked, both angry and in pain. The woman I married, turned out to only see Tatay Nanay as an ibang tao (outsider).
At that moment, the doctor came out of the hospital room and announced:
“Kung hindi mababayaran agad ang ₱40,000, hindi namin maipagpapatuloy ang gamot ng pasyente.”
My Nanay burst into tears, slumping down on the chair. I shakily took out my phone to call my friends for a loan, my hands shaking non-stop. As for Mariel, she still stood there with her arms crossed, looking on as if everything was unrelated.
Fortunately, after running around everywhere, I finally gathered enough money to pay Tatay’s hospital bills. He was out of danger, but still lying motionless, requiring long-term treatment.
Seeing Tatay gasping for air behind an oxygen tube, my heart ached. But before the pain could subside, resentment welled up in my heart — the person who was supposed to shoulder the burden with me, was standing outside like a spectator.
A few days later, when I returned home from the hospital, exhausted, Mariel was still sitting at the dressing table, scrolling through her phone, smiling faintly:
“O, nakita mo na? Kahit wala ako, kaya mo pa rin. Kaya huwag mo akong sisihin na wala akong pakialam.”
I was silent for a moment, then blurted out:
“Hindi ko akalaing kaya mong maging ganito ka-bato. Akala ko pamilya tayo…”
Mariel interrupted:
“Pamilya? Oo, pero dapat malinaw. Ang pera ko, para sa akin at sa anak ko. Ang Nanay at Tatay mo, responsibilidad mo, hindi ko. Hindi ako cash machine ng pamilya mo.”
Her words made my blood rush to my head. I shouted:
— “Kung itinuturing mong parang ibang tao sina Nanay at Tatay, huwag mong isiping habambuhay kong tatratuhin ka bilang pamilya!”
The house was silent, only the heavy breathing of both of us could be heard.
That night, I could not sleep. I sat by my son’s bed, watching him sleep soundly, my heart aching. I wondered: When he grows up, how will he see his parents? A helpless Ama (father), a cold Ina (mother)… Is this family still something he can be proud of?
The next morning, when I returned to the hospital, Nanay pulled me aside, her eyes red:
“Anak, sasabihin ko na ang totoo… kung si Mariel ay hinahamak ang Nanay at Tatay mo, pag-isipan mo na. Ang taong mayaman sa pera pero salat sa malasakit at pagmamahal, wala rin iyan — anino lang ng malamig na kaluluwa.”
I was speechless. For the first time, Nanay – who was usually patient, advised me to reconsider this marriage.
The question kept nagging at me: Should I keep a marriage but lose the love, or let go to find peace for both?
Part 2: The Declaration of War in the Family
The house was filled with a heavy atmosphere for many days. I silently worried about Tatay in the hospital, and Mariel grew more and more distant, as if we were no longer living together.
One evening, Nanay came to the house, her eyes dark from lack of sleep, but her gaze more determined than ever.
She sat down in the middle of the living room, her voice trembling but firm:
“Anak, today, Nanay must make it clear. Kung ayaw talagang tumulong si Mariel, then you must choose. Either you protect this family, or you continue to be despised in your own home.”
Mariel came down the stairs and heard everything. She sneered, crossing her arms over her chest:
“So ito pala ang plano ninyo? Pinipilit si Raj na pumili? Nanay, huwag niyo akong hamunin. Ako ang asawa niya, ako ina ng anak niya. At that pipili siya, siguradong hindi ako ang aalis.”
Nanay slammed her hand on the table, her voice filled with tears:
“Hindi, Mariel! Asawa ka nga niya, pero hindi ibig sabihin na may karapatan kang apak-apakan ang maulang niya. Na walang respeto sa Tatay Nanay ng asawa, hindi dapat mangibabaw in this family!”
The atmosphere was so tense that you could hear a pin drop. I stood in the middle, my heart pounding, both sides looked at me expectantly.
Mariel approached me, her eyes cold, each word cutting like a knife:
“Raj, pumili ka na. Ako at ang anak natin… o sila. Kung pipiliin mo sila, lalayas ako ngayong gabi, kasama ang anak natin. At huwag mong asahang makikita mo pa kami.”
Nanay burst into tears, grabbing my hand:
“Anak, huwag mong hayaang pagmamahal ng blind daughter-in-law robbed me of my conscience and filial piety. If I accept, Tatay will slowly die in helplessness, and I will also slowly die in regret!”
I choked, my whole body trembling. I looked at Mariel – dark red lips, challenging eyes. I looked at Nanay – silver white hair, teary eyes pleading for help.
I felt like my soul was torn in two.
— “Bakit? Bakit kailangan ko pang pumili? Hindi ba pwedeng pamilya tayong lahat? Bakit kailangan gawing laban ang pagmamahal?” – I screamed, my voice breaking.
Mariel squeezed my hand, her voice firm:
— “Raj, huwag kang magpanggap. Pumili ka ngayong gabi. Kung hindi… ako mismo ang aalis, dala-dala ang anak natin. At kapag umalis ako, wala nang balikan.”
Nanay knelt before me, tears streaming down her face:
— “Anak, Nanay doesn’t want you to be in pain, but if you live your whole life in cold indifference, Nanay would rather lose her son-in-law than lose her only son…”
The room was stuffy, I stood there, speechless. Two women, two different directions, one side was blood, the other was wife and children.
I had to choose
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