After 7 Months of Dating Without Even Holding Hands, I Urged Him to Marry Me—But Ended Up “Running Away Without My Shoes” on Our Wedding Night

On the very day we discussed marriage with our families, his parents brought over 10 gold taels to formally propose and said they would personally choose an auspicious date for the wedding.

I’m 30 years old and a single mother to a 5-year-old daughter.

I left my husband when my daughter was 2 and have been raising her on my own ever since.

I had gotten to know a few men over the years, but I never chose to be with any of them—each had some flaw or red flag that made me hesitate.

Then, near the end of last year, I met a man by chance during a friend’s birthday dinner. He was handsome, well-mannered, and appeared to be financially well-off. I was the one who made the first move—I approached him, started a conversation, and asked for his contact information.

At first, we only talked over the phone, but since we got along quite well, we decided to meet in person. He already knew that I had been married before and was raising a child on my own, but he didn’t mind that at all.

I had even taken my daughter to visit his family a few times, and everyone treated us kindly—they seemed to genuinely care about both me and my child.

After a few months of getting to know each other, I agreed to be in a relationship with him. The more we loved each other, the more compatible we seemed. What I appreciated most was how much he cared for both me and my daughter. He was generous—he never hesitated to buy things for me, give gifts to my child, and even lent me money without ever asking for it back.

What I admired most about this man was how polite, well-mannered, and seemingly well-raised he was. He came across as someone from a traditional, respectable family. He was soft-spoken, calm, and never once crossed any boundaries. In fact, to be completely honest, during our entire 7-month relationship, we had never even held hands. He never made a move, and I was too shy to initiate, but that only made me respect him more. It felt like he was truly serious about our relationship.

Because he had so many good qualities—while I, on the other hand, had many disadvantages, especially having a child—my parents kept urging me to take the next step with him.

One day while we were talking, I half-jokingly mentioned marriage. To my surprise, he agreed immediately and asked to set a date for his parents to come over and formally discuss the proposal. Needless to say, my parents and I were overjoyed—we rushed to choose a good date for the wedding.

On the very day we had the formal meeting with both families, his parents brought 10 taels of gold to propose marriage and said they would personally find an auspicious date for the wedding.

I took 5 taels of the gifted gold and sold them to contribute money so my parents could help cover the wedding expenses. I used the rest for small purchases for me and my daughter and to book a short trip for her before the wedding.

So the 10 taels of gold basically disappeared in a short time, but I wasn’t worried because I believed that by marrying him, I’d surely gain access to many more “pots of gold” to spend freely.

Our wedding was held over two days at a restaurant, so it was quite expensive. The money I received from friends as wedding gifts was handed over to my parents to help settle the final bill with the venue. As for his share, I asked him several times, but he never gave a clear answer—just dodged the question.

It wasn’t until after the two-day wedding, when I moved into his house, that the dream began to crumble.

It turned out that the wealth he and his family showed was all just a façade. The impressive 5-story house he often took me to before the wedding wasn’t even theirs—it was a rental property shared by him and his parents.

And worse, after the wedding, my mother-in-law even demanded money from me:

“Please return to me the 10 taels of gold I brought to your house earlier. That gold was rented from someone else with high interest, so the sooner you return it, the less interest we’ll owe. If you don’t pay back the full amount, they’ll charge you a huge amount of interest.”

“Why do I have to pay interest? That gold was a gift from you, so why do I have to return it now?” I asked.

“It was your husband who borrowed it under his name. Now that you’re married, aren’t you equally responsible for paying it back?”

It turned out I wasn’t just expected to repay the gold and the interest — I also had to help my in-laws pay for the wedding expenses…

The most shocking part was when my mother-in-law declared:

“You can’t bring your child from your previous relationship to live here, alright? Just look at our place — a 50-square-meter apartment that we’re renting. We already have three people living here. Adding a fourth means there’s no space for that child. It’s best if you leave her with your parents.”

“How can you say that? This family deceived me! You didn’t just lie about the money — you lied about this too. You clearly agreed before the wedding that I could bring my daughter to live with us. And now this?”

“Well, yes, we agreed at the time. But we’ve changed our minds. Raising a child is expensive and complicated. Besides, you’ll surely give us a grandchild of our own soon, right? So why should we raise someone else’s child? If it weren’t for the fact that my son couldn’t find a wife for so long, I would never have agreed to let him marry a divorced single mom like you with a child from another man.”

“Being a single mom doesn’t mean I’m any less deserving. My child is innocent and doesn’t deserve to hear this kind of talk from you.”

But that wasn’t even the end of it. The longer I stayed, the clearer it became why my husband had remained single for so long. As it turns out, he’s just a grown man who never stopped being his mother’s little boy.

Aside from going out to work, once my husband is home, everything is taken care of by my mother-in-law — from his meals, laundry, and tidying up his sleeping area. She even decides what he wears, what he eats, who he can or cannot meet each day.

She even brought her pillow into our room to sleep with us on our wedding night. His salary has always been managed by her, and whenever he wants to buy something, she is the one who purchases it for him.

When I asked him why he never “went beyond holding hands” during our courtship, he said, “Before I left the house, Mom didn’t tell me to hold my girlfriend’s hand, so I didn’t.”

I was horrified — and this was only half a day into living in my new in-laws’ house. But I don’t dare ask for a divorce because if I end another marriage, I’m afraid my parents won’t be able to handle the shock. Yet every day, my daughter and my own parents call and ask when I’ll be bringing my child over to live with me. I don’t know what to do anymore.