“Every night my husband leaves a squash by his bedside, sometimes big, sometimes small. I was suspicious and woke up in the middle of the night, shocked to see him busy…”

In recent days, I have noticed that my husband is acting… unusual.

Every night when he went to bed, he  took a squash with him  and quietly  placed it on the bedside table . Some days  the squash was as long  as a sword, other days  it was short . When I asked him, he mumbled:

– Go to sleep. It’s a man’s job…

What? Is
squash also  a “man’s business” ?
I began to doubt.
Could it be that my husband  was  so  superstitious that he worshiped squash  to pray for a child? Or  did he have a physiological problem  that I didn’t know about?

On Wednesday night, I  secretly did not sleep , waiting for him to breathe evenly, I still saw his hand  holding the squash  close to his body.

At around 2am, I  was startled  to see him  sit up, tiptoe out of the room, carrying a squash.

I  sneaked along.

When I got to the back kitchen, I was shocked…

He was busy grinding the squash on an iron basket , occasionally pouring water into the bowl, stirring with his hands…  the squash became soft and thick like bath water.

I  turned on the light and shouted :

– What are you doing in the middle of the night!?

The husband  jumped, almost falling  into the tub of squash water:

– Oh my god! You… don’t misunderstand! I was just… I was just making shampoo…

– Washing hair with loofah!? 2am!?

He  stammered to explain :

– Well… because you often complain about hair loss, so I asked my mom, she said  washing your hair with raw loofah helps hair grow.  I’ve been testing it for a few days to check if my scalp is allergic, if it’s safe then I’ll let you use it…

I was stunned. I was both embarrassed and amused.
I thought he  was offering squash  or  doing something shady.  Who would have thought…

Final Twist: But then… a few days later

Later that night, he  gave me a bottle of  homemade loofah juice and told me to try it.

I was touched, washed my hair 3 days in a row.

On the fourth day,  his scalp broke out in a red rash and was itching like crazy.
He went to the doctor and found out  he had mistaken young squash for… bitter melon.

I  kicked him out of the house one night.  He sat in the yard  hugging a bowl of squash and crying.
And me? Scratching my head, I screamed:

–  Next time you love your wife, love her with your brain, honey!  Not everything that is green and long is a “miracle drug”!!!